Been working from home for a long time, wife and I were incredibly frustrated with each other years ago: - She interrupted me all day and it drove me nuts - I responded like a jerk to everything Fix was easy, I moved my desk to a room with a door and then we had two rules 1. Door closed? No interruptions. She had to call or text me as if I was at an office if she or kids needed me 2. If I was at my computer OUTSIDE of the office, and somebody starts talking to me, I close the lid and listen because my work is interrupting the family Fixed everything
Benjamin Crozat
 @benjamincrozat
Nov 7
Dad developers. How can you even work at home when you have a kid and a pregnant wife who are always interrupting you? Yes, I have my own office. But it seems like they are mistaking it for a hallway or something.

Nov 8, 2025 · 3:51 PM UTC

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Replying to @ryanflorence
Her: Standing in the doorway till you finally notice her 😂 Me? Been remote for over a decade. My signals are simple: Headphones or standing desk = deep in the zone. If I’m standing and there’s music playing… that’s full focus mode. At that point, the world could be on fire and I’d still be shipping. I know, horrible.
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you sound really cool
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Replying to @ryanflorence
3. Both of you follow those rules in good faith
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red flag on the relationship if you have to add that rule 😅
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Replying to @ryanflorence
Lol sometimes you gotta tell the spouse to pound sand
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eh no, we were both doing it wrong
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Replying to @ryanflorence
That is exactly that happened to me when I first started this journey. I still feel bad for responding like I did sometimes. Now I have an office with similar rules, and it works out pretty well now. The beginning of this journey I almost quit because we would argue way more than I liked.
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Replying to @ryanflorence
I got a strip of LED lights around my office door, color changing with a remote. When I was in a meeting, it's red. If there's no fire or blood there's no entry. If it's yellow, it needs to be a good reason but I'm open to interruption. Green or any other color or outside of my office, talk to me and I'll focus on you!
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Replying to @ryanflorence
Yes a door is a must. A caveat is my laptop doesn’t leave my office, and if I’m not in the office all bets are off lol… which can be a rabbit hole if I only intended to walk out for a snack or a short break and then I get ambushed with several chores 🤣
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Replying to @ryanflorence
I built a small office in our backyard. It helps with setting boundaries, but it also helped with my mindset of working from home. That ten steps from my back door to my office makes a difference.
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Replying to @ryanflorence
That spike of irritation you feel is horrible and feels so alien the moment it fades.
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Replying to @ryanflorence
this is what I do with my gf currently and it works like a charm we both have offices
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Replying to @ryanflorence
I do the same BUT when the 3-year-old urgently needs to find his favorite pillow (or simply wants to chat), there's no stopping him.
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Replying to @ryanflorence
My wife has always been good about this, been working from home primarily for 6-7 years now, and when the door is closed she knows I’m busy, no issues at all
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Replying to @ryanflorence
Amen, I had the exact same situation, that was the fix
Replying to @ryanflorence
I do the same thing with my kids. Amazing difference.
Replying to @ryanflorence
or get a backyard office. inside it = work time. outside = family time. everyone knows the rule that's what our WorkPod does for dev dads 👌
Replying to @ryanflorence
I'd try this out Just got married and it seems like i'm more distracted
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Replying to @ryanflorence
Great rules. @_ChrisCovington and I have a similar understanding. His headphones over his ears means DND. I won’t text unless it’s an emergency and almost nothing is. If his headphones are off, I’m free to disturb him. And most nights I coax him from his keyboard by 6pm
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Replying to @ryanflorence
It's hard balancing it. I find headphones on and concentrate works. My kids both have a PC in the same room as me so I got used to the noise and know how to drown them out if they are just playing. I found this to be better than having a quiet room and when I hear them getting annoyed at the noise
Replying to @ryanflorence
sounds like a very easy fix! :) any ideas if you don't have an "office" space inside home with a door?
Replying to @ryanflorence
Great advice! The way I do it with my fiancée is time-based. We both work from the same home office. During work hours, no interruptions, except for the occasional coffee/kiss/hug. I guess I’ll need my own room once we have kids 😆
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Replying to @ryanflorence
These things are real and solutions are real. It's only natural for 2 people living together to feel traction, get annoyed by each other, fight and argue. What matters is staying together nevertheless and finding solutions for that.
Replying to @ryanflorence
And I often work with a toddler on my lap while orchestrating my family of ten through our day...
Replying to @ryanflorence
Never work from the kitchen. Have an actual office. Very good advice.
Replying to @ryanflorence
Masterplan! Visual distinction changes everything
Replying to @ryanflorence
- I do this too - only difference is I have the office in a different floor.
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Replying to @ryanflorence
It might seem simple but this is so useful.
Replying to @ryanflorence
Love this idea
Replying to @ryanflorence
Oh so it’s not just me that responds like a herk when being constantly interrupted. Good to know! I will try this.
Replying to @ryanflorence
Control your environment. One of the most important decision-making rules.
Replying to @ryanflorence
Pretty good, must try this
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