I told my parents how much my equity is worth once it vests and my mom sent me a link to a Birkin Bag and my dad sent me a link to a zoo's Instagram page with a video of some capybaras and said "one of these"

Nov 4, 2025 ยท 11:03 PM UTC

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my sister wants an Xbox. She is being sneaky because she knows I will feel bad about the feasibility of this purchase now and simply buy it for her
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Replying to @viemccoy
Little do they knowโ€ฆ. -80% incoming
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Lol
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the two genders
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the two what?
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Replying to @viemccoy
I'm collecting funds on behalf of the Derek Zoolander Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good! It's a tax deductible gesture of kindness that you can share your generosity w via Venmo or CashApp, pls DM for details. Each bit of equity ensures one less bit of cognitive decline due to LLM use. Ty
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I love that fund, its on my list of "when I vest" (I wont have the money for a couple years minimum)
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Replying to @viemccoy
I don't know what your family relationship is, but it seems like once people get nice salaries there family acts entitled to your wealth.
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My family rocks and I owe them so much
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Worth noting that capybaras are social animals and really shouldn't be owned in increments of less than 2. Do what you will with that knowledge.
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we will eat the AI researchers, not because their meat is tender, but because it is hard
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Sword
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Based dad
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Ain't it nice, having people you love counting your money for you?
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Wow cant imagine When I first told my parent I finally made my first million I wanted to celebrate by taking them out for dinner They still insisted on paying ๐Ÿ˜น To be fair, they probably have more money than I have ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
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my dad wants a Lexus RX350
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such a dad move
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one of these
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Praying for u extra hard rn Vie
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Specific and objective
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Based dad tbh
Replying to @viemccoy
But did you explain profit participation units ๐Ÿ˜‚
Replying to @viemccoy
I got you for the birkin sir
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Lmaoo
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A capybara would be fire but your dad needs 2-3 as they are social animals.
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idk what your equity is worth but i ran some numbers a while back and it seemed like one could run a 100-animal capybara domestication project for surprisingly cheap. around a half-mil p/a with under $1mm capex year 1 to get rolling. JUST A THOUGHT
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Replying to @viemccoy
In love with the idea that dad was not asking you for one but actually saying something like โ€œlet me put you on to the good stuff rqโ€
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Replying to @viemccoy
Tell them vest is not exit. Birkin after liquidity, not after a 409A slide. Capybaras get a four year vest. Protect the cap table before it becomes a capybara table.
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Replying to @viemccoy
I donโ€™t think capybaras are that expensive to buy but the guy at the random desert capybara petting zoo I went to gave me a thousand yard stare of horror and was like, โ€œno, no one should ever own these, I wish we didnโ€™tโ€ (apparently very bad animals to keep lol)
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